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Driving Through Ohio

Words and Music © 2007 by Tom Smith
Released under a Creative Commons Noncommercial ShareAlike License
Written for Earpicac, a fund-raising CD intended to get members of The FuMP to a convention in Akron, Ohio.

I like driving through Ohio,
There's nowhere else that I would rather drive,
Yes, I would rather be
On US 23
Or the Interstate 75
Who cares about the Pennsylvania Turnpike
Route 66, or Florida's I-4
Yes, I like driving through Ohio
'Cause it's flat and boring as your kitchen floor.

There's nothing for miles no matter where you look
There isn't anything to do or see
So while I drive I can read the latest book
Make an omelet or watch Heroes on TV

The folks in Ohio are really really great,
They're courteous and helpful all to heck
It's like they're apologizing for their frickin' state
Being duller than Ben Affleck

Yes, I like driving through Ohio
From Cleveland down to Cincinnati
Toledo has a zoo, Columbus has one too,
And in Findlay I can stop and pee
The service stations have the finest petrol,
It'll really send you on your way,
Yes, I like driving through Ohio,
As long as I don't live here every day.

Two, four, six, eight,
Turn left at the mosque to escape the state

I like driving through Ohio,
As long as I don't have to stop and stay.

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